On having tripped myself up.

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I had no idea what was going on. I thought that I’d prepared. Over-prepared, in fact.

 

I doubled the amount of time it’d take me to finish up the first installment of my graphic novel — Salt ‘n Pepper. I’d completed the script, leaving the fun parts for after the Kickstarter. I scheduled and booked off at least 2 hours every day for the following 7 months to sit down and work on the graphic novel.

 

Why was I stalling and being stopped in such an epically frustrating and stress-inducing way?

 

If you’ve ever done anything remotely like a crowdfunder, or had that type of financial or emotional investment from other people for a project that you’re super passionate about — you can probably relate to that sense of sheer terror and panic as you feel yourself slipping. In my case, slipping four months after Flavours of Life; Story 1 of 4 fully funded. Completely giving up and falling off the wagon after seven months — when the date of my self-imposed deadline passed.

 

Eventually, I gave myself permission to not care so much. Then not care anymore.

 

And I finally started to think about Salt ’ Pepper without that sense of sheer terror, overwhelm and frustration. I revisited ideas, concepts and images that had flashed through my head in the course of creating Flavours of Life since its conception. Looked at the themes and messages I wanted to communicate.

 

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I felt a wave of relief and frustration — I could finally see the biggest obstacle that I’d been running into the past year. Previous scripts for Salt ’n Pepper were synopsis’s of the episode with an estimated page count and location indicator. This script was too detailed and literal. (There were panel by panel image directions.)

 

It had completely slipped my mind that I’d experimented with a new way of creating a comic script without first testing the process of creating a comic from start to end.

 

Sometimes the systems and methods that you start to make things easier are the very things that create obstacles.

 

Creating is already a difficult process. Don’t suddenly change an aspect of how you work on in big and important projects.

 

And sometimes we just have to accept when something just isn’t (going to) happen(ing) for it to happen. Making everything detailed made me subconsciously think “What’s the point? » — I had basically already communicated and created my story. There still needs to be an element of surprise, unsurity and uncertainty in order for me to create.

 

It’s been super nice to get back into it. Back into working on the Salt ‘n Pepper story, and have it be this thing that’s fun and easy to work on and show up to again.
In progress and facing obstacles,

Maïmouna

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